November 17, 2012. Exactly one year ago today. This is an important date, the start of a week that will be locked in my memory until the day I die. This is the day it all began, sort of. This is the day that my path in life bent firmly towards its current direction. This is the day when I started to realize something was seriously wrong with me, something that had to be discovered and fixed. Except the only discovery I was to make is that there was no fix, no repair, no recovery.
It was a Saturday last year, this date in history. I was out shopping at Costco. The CFL Semi-Finals were to happen on Sunday and I had someone coming over to watch the game with me. Supplies were required; Costco was my intended source. So I got up, dressed, drove my truck over to Costco and went shopping.
I was still walking then, albeit with a cane. Stairs had started to become a problem, as were ramps and pretty much any upslope in the sidewalk. Costco has a flat parking lot, a flat entry and a flat floor, so nothing seemed all that out of place. I went in, got a cart, and did my shopping. No big deal, just grab a few things, pay, and head back out to the truck.
It was on the way to the truck when it happened. I fell. I fell hard. I fell hard even though I had the cane to keep my upright, to support my failing legs. I fell hard enough that people around me heard me bash into my truck and heard my cane clatter to the ground. Several people came rushing over to see if I was okay. I was fine, but not very happy with myself. I used the truck's running board to get up. I dusted myself off. I got in the truck and went home, shaken, scared.
Falling down with the cane was the last straw for me. I had already fallen several times without the cane. I knew I was in some sort of trouble and I knew I had to find out what it was. The Neurology Clinic in Calgary had told me I wasn't a High Priority since I wasn't suffering any pain. In a way they were correct; regardless of any priority, there was nothing they could have done. I talked to my doctor and he suggested that the best way for me to get seen was to go to a hospital Emergency Ward, and there demand to see a doctor.
So I made a decision. I decided that on Monday after work I would go into the Emergency Ward at Foothills Hospital here in Calgary, to get someone to look at me. My doctor had told me that I should "go into emerg, fall down and pee my pants. They have to treat you." I was pretty sure I wouldn't need all the histrionics, but I knew it was time to take serious action and find out why I was falling down.
One year ago today, I started down this path. I fell.
Oh honey that is so sad, It makes me cry. What a horrible thing to happen to you and to continue happening to you.
ReplyDeleteMy love my dear one.
Mom