Food Sins

Tonight's dinner is French Bread, perhaps with a bit of melted cheese on top, along with Asiago Cheese and Artichoke Dip. I did not make the bread. I did not make the dip. Even the melted cheese will be pre-shredded, if I use it at all. I have to express some disappointment in all this. It's not really what I like to do.

If you now anything about me, you know how much I love to cook, to make my own meals, along with it's concommitant activity of grocery shopping. I probably spend far more on groceries than I should, yet somehow I manage to consume most, if not all, of the fresh food each week. Even the frozen food slowly wears away, along with the canned goods in my pantry.

The problem is that cooking for one has become too much effort. In fact cooking at all has become a substantial effort. I rarely cook solo anymore; I need help so I count on friends coming over. It is only then that I actually get busy in the kitchen, or rather at my table. I can't work on the kitchen counters; fortunately I can still work on my dining table, cutting and chopping at a level more convenient to me.

Still, I find myself increasingly purchasing prepared foods, something antithetical to my approach to food. I hate the idea of industrial food, yet I am more and more compelled towards it thanks to my own failing abilities. I mean, so much prepared food is overloaded with sugar, salt, and unhealthy kinds of fats. I admit I have always had some commercial food stocks; some things just work better that way. For example, I buy Chick Peas, Kidney Beans, Black Beans and Brown Beans by the can. I also buy mixed beans, but not the Bean Salad prepared stuff. I make my own Bean Salad.

There are a number of things I like to eat, and make regularly. Almost all of them these days have some prepared food component. Ceasar Salad; I used the prepared dressing rather than making my own. Mushrooms. I buy the sliced ones these days so I don't have to slice them. I buy cooked shrimp now rather than raw; it just takes too much to cook and peel it all. There are other nasty little food sins I won't confess here, but trust me, I'll sin rather than not eat.

Having ALS is all about making compromises with your own body. I will do what I can, as long as I can. At some point, I won't be able to do any of my own food preparation. Then it will be Meals on Wheels. I'm resisting that with all of my being. That seems the greatest food sin of all to me.