Hello, Goodbye

It has been a week of hellos and goodbyes. Over the weekend, I said hello to my brothers, Jim and Peter; to my friends from the coast, Chris, Chris and Dianne; to many other friends whom I have not seen for many months who came to my birthday party. Then first it was Peter to head home, then Jim, then Chris, and this morning, Chris and Dianne. Last night we celebrated with one of our young friends as she prepared to move to Peterborough, Ontario, for a new career opportunity. Just as there were happy hellos, there were sad goodbyes.

Dianne said something important this week. While coming here for my birthday party, she was also coming here to see her aging and fragile parents. After seeing them yesterday, she said "I make sure I say goodbye to them every time I see them. It may be the last time." She went on to explain how she made sure she said she loved them, how important it was for her to be at peace with herself when she left, since she might not see them again.

I thought about this a lot as I said goodbye to Chris and Dianne this morning, unspoken thoughts, realizing that this might as well be said of me, or for that matter, of any of us. None of us knows the number of our days. This might well be the last time I see them, not for any lack of want or effort on either part but as a result of the vagaries of life.

With children spread out away from me, with my Mom and Ray in Vancouver, with my brothers scattered about the continent, with friends dear to me while far from me, I never know, I could never assume that I will see anyone of them again. Each day, each moment, might be the last. I know that one day will be the last day that we meet, I just don't know which one or for whom.

Dianne's approach is the best one, to be at peace when you see someone, when you depart from them or they from you. I want to tell all those whom I love that I love them, that I miss them, that I want them in my life constantly, that I value them, treasure them, hold them dear in my heart. I want to be sure that the next time I say goodbye isn't the last; if it is, I want them to know how important they are do me.