Dealing With Feelings

It's funny how your emotions can turn around, not on a dime, not in some manic swing, but for the better, with only a little help from your friends. Yesterday I was feeling the frustration of all this, the passage of time with only small advances in my renovation project, the passage of time with the continuing loss of my life and freedom, the passage of time separated from my children and grandchildren. Yesterday I was still feeling the depression and distress from earlier days.

The day itself went like most other days. Jim did a bunch of work on the doorway to my bedroom. In fact the principal construction associated with the bathroom and hallway is pretty much done. He doesn't think he will do the hall closet; he's not sure he has the time and he feels I don't need it, so it can be left the way it is. As frustrating as this is for me, my only other choice is to hire a framer to do the work. Doing that seems almost disrespectful to Jim, as if I was betraying all that he has given me lately. So I have to deal with that feeling.

Another contractor came in to look at the bathroom work. He brought his plumber with him and they spent a good deal of time looking at the options that would give me the bathroom I want. They listened and shared their own ideas, then talked alone for a bit. The contractor emailed references to me and I will be calling them this afternoon. He says he will give me a price on Friday. It's another delay. So I have to deal with that feeling.

Jim finished the day with the framing for the bathroom door. He was unable to hang the door in the wall; he ran out of time. He did, however, have it to the place where a couple of buddies of mine could come over and hang the door for me. So Mike, Tonny and Dion all showed up and we tried to hang the door. Unfortunately the pre-hung frame had a warp in the top and no matter how we tried the door would not hang straight. So instead we had a pizza, ate some chicken wings, and drank a couple of beers.

Spending time with the guys, yakking about nothing in general, the four of us trying to hang a warped door; it all made for a pretty good evening. I was left with the feeling that I had a life and I could enjoy it even with the frustrations therein. That's the kind of feeling I like to deal with.