Tuesday, 18 February 2014

No Panic Attack This Morning

A week or so back I was having trouble with being too cold, shivering while in bed. Last night it was just the opposite; I sweat so much I left stains on the sheets so bad that it is time to change the bed again. This is getting to be a nuisance. I didn't sleep much last night either, a combination of worry over apartment renovations and general insomnia. To top it all of, I woke up early and simply could not get back sleep.

At least the dreaded anxiety attacks seem to be over. While I was at the ALS clinic the other day, a routine event so common now that it doesn't really even deserve a blog entry, I talked to the neurologist about my depressive episode and my panic attacks in the mornings. He suggested we look at a mild anti-depressant. I was reluctant at first, having dealt with Prozac a decade ago, a medication that left me feeling like I was only half-way there. The only thing Prozac really did was make it easier for my ex-wife to manage me.

Then we went on to talk about Pseudo-Bulbar Affect, a problem which seems to be getting worse for me. I come to tears for things all out of proportion to their importance. It is beginning to make me uncomfortable in public, lest an episode happen at a completely inappropriate time. There is a reason the refer to it as Inappropriate Emotional Expressive Disorder these days, rather than just PBA.

When I described what was going on, the neurologist pointed out that a milder dose of the same anti-depressant would help with the PBA, so I agreed to start taking it. It is interesting that in as soon as a few days I can see the difference. The doctor said it would take a few days to cut in, but I was expecting something more along the lines of a week or so. I don't know if this is simply a placebo effect or if the new drug is helping that quickly; I don't care. I was on the rise anyway, this is just a plus.

I woke up this morning after a rugged night, a night thinking about renovations and changes and all kinds of other things, a night spent worrying for no reason about things that need not worry me. This is not a new behaviour. The new behaviour was waking, expecting the anxiety and panic attack, and not getting it. This is a much better way to start the day.


  1. I'm glad you began your day in a better frame of mind. Smart to take the medicine offered. It is for your good. And if anyone needs it you do. You have so much to deal with.
    love you honey.

  2. Panick attacks are one of the worst things to have. I've had several myself throughout my life, here are many of the symtoms:

    - Shortness of breath/wheezing
    - dizzyness
    - nausia
    - gagging
    - throwing up
    - Fatigue or weakness of the body and muscles
    - drastic mood changes, like crying constantly, getting angry out of the blue.
    - Blackouts
    - numbness and lightheadedness
    - Everything seems like the end of the world
    - You scramble for things, anything to you seems like it will help
    - You look for answers anywhere you can find them
    - shaking
    - Headache or Migraine
    - Screaming/having a mental breakdown
    - little things freak you out or stress you out
    - what caused the panic when your panicking, u think nothing will sort it out.
    - bad thoughts streaming through your mind a million miles a second
    - Heart races, feels like your going to have a heart attack
    how long do panic attacks last