Tired Arms; Less Dancing

I am a bit late writing today, courtesy of the Canada/USA Olympic Hockey Semi-Final. It was a thrilling game with a terrific outcome, at least for Canada. It was also a good way to start the morning, simply relaxing and enjoying the game. It is an activity that does not tire me as much as others.

Of late I find my arms, and particularly my left arm, tiring more easily and hurting. I suspect this is a result of the start of de-nervation and muscle atrophy in my arms. My left arm is now measurably weaker than even a few weeks ago. This decline is predictable even though we had all hoped it would be a while before it began. Yet here it is, and this is how it will go, until my arms are so weak I cannot use them at all.

The loss of my arms will have substantial and far reaching effects on my life. As the weeks go by from here it will become increasingly difficult for me to do things like driving and cooking. I will still do what I can for as long as I can; this process could take upwards of a year to get to the point where my arms have failed completely. Nobody really knows what might happen along the way, although it looks fairly clear.

Already the loss of my arms is having an impact. One of the things I have enjoyed, even in the wheelchair, is dancing. When I go the Name That Tune or when I go out to social events, I have a great time getting my wheelchair rocking and rolling, moving about and even doing the odd slow dance, with my arms as the driving force for motion and mobility. This is now becoming a problem. The tiredness in my arms makes it harder to move my body, and my legs, oddly enough, develop a kind of pain in them that I can only assume is nerve based, a result of the nerves trying to fire into the dead and disconnected muscles. All in all, I tire very quickly and simply cannot continue.

I'm not done yet; I'll keep going as long as I can. It will just be fewer dances, slower dancing. I can still enjoy the music and fun. All I have to do is learn to enjoy it more from the sidelines than in the middle of the action. I can do that.