Out Of The Way

Today will be one of the most frustrating days of my renovations. We are moving all of the furniture out of my bedroom and the living room, pulling up the carpet and preparing for the installation of laminate flooring tomorrow. It is getting increasingly difficult for me to roll my wheelchair over the carpet. I can still do it, but the work of it is tiring. And when I say "we", I really mean Jim, Peter, Mike and Dion.

What will make this day frustrating is that I will be completely unable to help, watch, supervise, micromanage, get in the way, or any of the other stuff which has made me feel a part of the process so far. In terms of moving things, both the limits of my wheelchair and the limits of my strength will mean I am just more in the way than anything. In terms of coordinating, suggesting, or expressing opinions, that's already enough of a challenge for those who help me. Imagine the worsening challenge of having me not just chatting and commenting, but doing so while every person must step and stumble around me.

The general consensus is that I must go out today, at least while the bulk of the work is going on. Alternatively, if I hang around I must be out of the areas where work is being done, away from view and the working pathways. It would appear that my limitations will now completely blunt any ability I would have to make successful input into this part of the renovations.

My brother tells me he takes great joy in not being around while others do this kind of work, that it is a good thing to leave and let others do the work for me. While I can agree with this sentiment and have spent a great deal of time not involved in the work of this renovation, I still feel the need to see it, to have some engagement with it. These renovations are not something I wanted; they are something thrust upon my be time and situation. These changes are made unwillingly. At a minimum I would hope to have something to say about them.

On the other hand, I will have a new floor in place tomorrow evening, a smooth rolling surface. Even if things go slowly and it takes an extra day, I will get to sleep in my own bedroom tomorrow night. For tonight I am at a hotel. No, I could not get a wheelchair room, anywhere. So it will be a regular room. Fortunately I will simply be sleeping there. I just need a place to be while I cannot be at home; I need to be out of the way.