I didn't write this morning; I'm doing it this afternoon instead. There is no rule which says I must write in the mornings. It's just a habit I have gotten into, a single discipline in a fairly undisciplined life. To be honest, I was too tired to get up this morning, not so much from ALS as from the late night with the boys. I got home as the sun was coming up.
It's been said that I push myself too much, stay up too late, burn too much energy. The are those, my Mom and Katherine included, who would like me to go to bed earlier, to take it easier, to rest more. I suppose it is true. I am working very hard these days to squeeze every little bit of life out of what life I have left. I want to end each day exhausted, having done enough to make even those who are healthy feel tired. I want to take each hour and live every minute in it.
This means some nights I will stay out later than I should, I will do more than is good for me. I will feel the exhaustion in the morning, almost unable to get moving. That was this morning. We had things to do today, a picnic in Kananaskis being foremost. We were going with my friend Mike, so we had a timeline. But a late night last night kept me wanting to sleep.
Unfortunately it was more than just overdoing it last night. This morning my left shoulder was in a great deal of pain, my left arm was particularly weak, my left hand was aching, and my fingers were still tingling. So I lazed and lazied about until the absolute last minute, dressing only once Katherine arrived with the supplies, finishing just as Mike arrived.
It will be an early night tonight. Tomorrow will be a rest day. Then I will get busy all over again.
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