Mother's Day

It's Mother's Day, a day where we honour our Moms. What's interesting is that Mother's Day did not start out as an honouring of motherhood, but as an association of Mothers protesting against the senseless ravages wrought in the Civil War in the United States. It was only after the hawkers of cards and peddlers of flowers got ahold of it that it became this commercial splurge, that it became its current self.

We talk about the abnormality of children dying before their parents. This is a thought which has only really occurred to those of us who were born after 1900. Prior to that, the death of a child was so common that names were not given until some time after a child was born, just in case. It was not at all uncommon for many children to die before thier parents, regardless of station in life. Queen Anne of England had 16 children, all but one of whom died in infancy. Her only surviving son, William, Duke of Gloucester, lived to 11 years of age then died of smallpox.

Much of the push behind larger families was to have surviving children, an ethos which continues in most third world countries. Even for my Mom, having children in the middle of the last century, five children was not considered a truly large family. On the other hand, having five boys in six years was considered just a bit unusual. The era of small families is a new one.

Even though I abhor the commercialization of this day to honour the sacrifices of motherhood, I too have succumbed, purchasing a small orchid for my Mom. I think the greater gift I can give to her is to be with her today, to give her the only gift I truly have remaining... time. It is likely that I will be the first of her sons to die, the first to leave a gap in her life unfilled by other children. It's not unnatural; it's just unhappy. For now, I will fill that gap as best I can by simply being here. It's not much; it's all I have.