My Life Is An Old Time Country Song

I think my life these days is a country and western song, or at least the lyrics to a good part of one. My arms are getting thinner, my legs are getting thinner, but my belly is getting fatter. All I need is a dog, a divorce and a pick-up truck.

Wait! I have all of those too. My ex-wife got the dog in the divorce, but at least I got to keep my pick-up truck! So here it goes. let me know what you think. If you have another verse to add, please do. Just don't forget the chorus.

My arms are gettin' skinny, my legs is that way too.
But my belly's gettin' fatter every day.
At least I kept my pick-up truck, when gettin' my divorce,
But my ex-wife took my good ole dog away.

If it weren't fer that I'm dyin', I tell you I'd be lyin',
If I didn't say my life is such a bore.
The secret that I'm keepin', is only when I'm sleepin',
My biggest fun I get in bed's a snore.

My arms are gettin' skinny, my legs is that way too.
But my belly's gettin' fatter every day.
At least I kept my pick-up truck ,when gettin' my divorce,
But my ex-wife took my good ole dog away.

My legs is done from walkin', but my mouth is still a-talkin',
At least that's one thing went my way.
The trouble is my mind, it just ain't to inclined,
To think about the words I'm gonna say.

My arms are gettin' skinny, my legs is that way too.
But my belly's gettin' fatter every day.
At least I kept my pick-up truck ,when gettin' my divorce,
But my ex-wife took my good ole dog away.

One day I'll soon be dead, my story fully read.
My book of life a-sittin' on some shelf.
But when I git to heaven, I'll stand six foot eleven,
And I'll dance around just like a Christmas elf.

Oh.........
My arms are gettin' skinny, my legs is that way too.
But my belly's gettin' fatter every day.
At least I kept my pick-up truck ,when gettin' my divorce,
But my ex-wife took my good ole dog away.

I can already here the dueling banjos and see the toothless tub thumper. Please God, forgive me.