I'm tired, lethargic. I continue to struggle with exhaustion, my body demanding sleep while all the while do little but sit in my wheelchair. I want to do something, but I don't know what to do. My fingers are tired. My hands are tired. My arms are tired. I can barely lift them.
Maybe that's it. Maybe the weakness in my arms and body is at the point where even small moves require large amounts of energy. I know that typing wears out my hands fairly quickly, as does holding on to my cell phone, whether talking or texting. I certainly can't carry anything for any distance without putting on my lap or into a bag.
I forget sometimes that the power of this disease is often hidden in plain sight. If my muscles are weak, it takes more to get even the simplest things done. That extra work makes me tired, just like it would make anyone else tired. I am no different that anyone else. If I work hard, I get tired. The problem is that the activities of daily living are becoming increasingly difficult.
I want to try to get outside today, in my power wheelchair, if only to get some fresh air and a sense of escape from my apartment. That might actually perk me up, fresh air and the ease of using my power chair. I have to do something. Sitting here, falling asleep, having done nothing today; I see that as the worst possible outcome.
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