I Don't Want To Eat

I have really no idea what to write about today. Nothing has really happened to me. I mean, yesterday was mostly idle until a late visit from Anne, a visit which included several Old Fashioneds. I cooked a bit on Saturday, but most of that was done by Kate and Tonny. So I am in a bit of a creative slump, which is affecting both my writing and my cooking.

Actually that was one of the best things about Anne's visit last night, beside her dog Echo. When I realized she was coming over it motivated me to cook something before she got here, not for her so much but for me. So I did a pot of Pot Stickers, little Vietnamese dumplings. They're easy enough to make, since I buy them frozen. All I have to do is put some oil in a frying pan, then put enough water in to cover the bottoms of the dumplings. You heat it until the water boils away, which cooks the Pot Stickers. The oil remaining is well distributed through the pan, and you use that to brown them a bit. After they are done, I put on a bit of Oyster Sauce and Soy Sauce, and it's dinner time.

Today is much the same. I didn't feel like eating breakfast this morning, so I asked my Home Care Aide to skip breakfast. I snacked on grapes and had a cup of coffee. I promised her I would eat some cereal later on, but I failed in that commitment. I just didn't feel like eating, or more correctly, I didn't feel like making anything to eat, not even a bowl of cereal.

My appetite seems to have come back a little this evening. I'm hungry, but that is often not the real problem. The real problem is whether the effort and energy required to make a meal for myself is worth the food in front of me. I'm not starving; my waistline declares that in full measure. But I regularly fail to eat because of the effort involved.

There are a couple of Polish dogs in the pot. The buns are steaming atop the pot on a screen. It won't take all that much to make two hot dogs for myself. But instead, I am here, at the keyboard, evading that work in exchange for this work. I'm gonna have to go eat, even if I don't really want to.