Senescence

I'm late in writing today. The only excuse is that I am exhausted, or at least incredibly sleepy. I'm not sure if it is from being over-active the last few days, especially after the incident on Monday, or if it is the Zopiclone I took last night, it's effects hanging on, doping out my day. Either way all I have managed to do so far today is sit in my power wheelchair, napping, occasionally shifting position, mostly drifting in and out of sleep.

Most likely it is the effects of all things combined. Although it wasn't much, bleeding internally, inside of my bladder, clotting suppressed by medications, certainly has an effect. Just getting over a long, stubborn infection in that same organ is almost certainly having an effect. My toss and turn night on Tuesday night did a fair bit of damage to my energy levels. And of course yesterday itself, with laundry, shopping, cooking, and bottling wine was the kind of day sure to sap my strength.

The most frustrating part of all of this is how long it takes my body to recover these days, from almost any insult, be it self-inflicted or otherwise. Certainly a part of this is age; I am, after all, in my sixties now. I would refer to myself as a sexogenarian, but that just sounds weird. Regardless of how you put it, I am at an age where my body would slow down, ALS or not. Were I better, I would be stronger, more enduring, more capable, yet still in my sixties. I am no longer a young man.

I don't mind getting older. I would like to get a lot older, but with the normal effects of aging. I don't want to go on too long with both senescence and ALS. It's a tough combination. One, or the other, that's it. I just seems fair, a reasonable thing to ask for.