Monday, 3 December 2012

I'm Still Me

Having a terminal illness changes you, but not as much as you might think. I am still the same person I was two weeks ago. I have the same issues and make the same mistakes (maybe different ones, but you know what I mean). I have the same fears and frailties. If having a terminal illness made you a saint, we would all be saints because we all suffer from the terminal illness of living.

Yesterday I had one of those days, the days where you do and say things and then later on go "what the heck was that all about". I think the only thing having ALS does is add some intensity to these kinds of days. Since time is short, everything takes on an urgency that it might not otherwise have.

What I need to do is remember that I am the one with the short shelf life, and just because I have a timeline doesn't mean everyone else has to have a timeline. I need to remember that "one day at a time" means enjoying each day, not stuffing it. Patience is important, for me and for everyone else.

Forgiveness is also important. I need to forgive others for their challenges, and myself for mine. So today I am going to focus on being patient and forgiving. I wonder how I will do?

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