Getting Worn Down, Over A Rib Roast

I have this nice little 2 pound rib roast I just took out of the freezer. I look at the price of it; $16.38. I think to myself how expensive that is for such a small bit of meat. Then I realize that I will barely be able to eat half of it, especially given how I am about the combination of cooking, followed by eating. It's entirely possible I will cook it, then eat none of it at all. That's the way it goes these days.

How I cook it will have some impact, not much, but a little. If I simply grill it, like a gigantic, thick steak, it won't be as much work. So perhaps I will eat a bit. If I oven roast it, with spices and all, and then make some gravy, I doubt I will each much, if any of it. I'll be too tired from the work. I could even do it on the BBQ, but again the work of it all will destroy my appetite.

Wine will help. It stimulates my appetite. But after a glass or two of wine, I'll just want to have more wine, and eat foods that require no preparation and little or no cutlery. I would likely chow down on my giant bowl of coleslaw rather than eat the steak. I might have a mouthful or two, maybe not. Plus there is the effort of cleaning up the BBQ, both before and after cooking.

Then there is the question of mushrooms. I love mushrooms, especially with a good cut of meat. This roast is one of the nicest cuts of meat going. I think Rib Roast is as good as it gets when it comes to beef. I am purely a carnivore on this front. Yet mushrooms make it so much better. So now I have to ask if I have the energy to go across the street, today or tomorrow, to get some fresh mushrooms. Will I feel like sauteing them? Will I want to clean and slice them? Is any of this worth the effort?

So the real questions are these. Who will come and help me cook? Who will eat with me? Who will bring mushrooms and help prepare them? Who will make the effort worthwhile. You see, I don't want to do any of this if I am left up to myself. It's too much work. Even now I'm thinking I should just put that Rib Roast back in the freezer and give up. The coleslaw will be enough, just like it will be tonight.

All of this, over a simple meal. It's the emotional side of ALS that really wears me down.